Picks a can of deoderant of the shelf, sprays himself with it, puts the can back on the shelf and walks out.
Lady next to me: Did he just spray himself with that can of deodorant and walk off?
Me: Yup. Some people.
Lady next to me: Tell me about it.
Cool story, bro.
I offered to buy your weed off you. Good money too. More than its street value. If you don’t want to share, don’t share. But don’t have me bum cigarettes off people for you and then disappear to smoke your mix on your own. That’s uncool. I hope your weed was laced. I hope you had a really bad trip. Asshole.
Ain’t that something.
It had been selected as the location for the first lunar colony, but Mission Control were in for quite a shock: the Sea of Serenity, chosen for its broad, flat plains, already played host to a giant hand that rose hundreds of metres above the moon’s surface. Scientists, astronomers and builders scrambled to explain the hand’s presence and exactly how they’d missed it during the planning phase; but no one was willing to talk about the possibility of an arm, a torso, a head, a pair of legs existing below the outer crust.
It all looks like it came from Frankie magazine. Except it’s endless. God Pinterest people are pretentiousness. I love you Tumblr, people. Let’s not see other websites.
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Re: We've been drinkingStacey: I don't think Tupac had shoes.Jenny: He totally had shoes. Just because he grew up in the projects doesn't mean he didn't have shoes! Thug Life still involves shoes!... ...
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I showed up to work today and my coworker asked me, “Is that your Budweiser sweater?”
…No, it’s my fluffy puppy sweater.
Yes. It’s my Budweiser...
